breakdown

I think at this time, its difficult for me to talk bout my feelings. I felt myself so useless n i feel like commit suicide... its so tiring being a human. Sometimes I m stubborn but this doesnt mean i m wrong. Different ppl do have weakness n their own personality. Last nite, I work at bed n it was good sales but then just now i was told to work at PJ Waikiki. I got shocked n unhappy. I know something goes wrong. I called Grace n she said that I din attend MOnday's meeting but i have told her earlier that I cant attend the meeting reason is simple, I hate Ah ting!He's the manager of all outlets. He's such an asshole! He thought he's so great! He take control everything and think he's powerful so he could control and scold everyone. His english is so bad yet he wanna speak his broken english! I dun mind if he wanna learn but he's not! he scolding ppl everytime...complaining only.

Like just now, Grace says that he complaint bout me that i was curi tulang while working. Harlow, he said that i was standing at the counter even ady 1.30am. Yeah supposingly V r told to go in after 1.30am but then last week there's nothing for me to do... i did all my services and whatever job i should do!Thats y i stood outside, i dunno for how long but i did stood outside. then that BASTARD took picture of me!During the meeting he showed the picture to Grace(team leader) Now grace thinks that i'm bad. N considering putting me on other places. WTF! The worst part, he sounded me for writing my blog coz i was mentioning bout my colleague! Then she said i shouldnt write that...its spoiling company's reputations! At that moment i really feel like wanna quit my job...really. i feel so tires with these ppl ady. BUt then i have no choice i need money to go for facial n eat somemore now i'm staying outside ady... But then if she keep putting here n there i might have quit oso... i m really tired... n fed up. God, pls make the world turn faster so i could graduate soon...
until this moment i still feel like crying coz Only me was blamed!!! Apple was standing there too but then she was not caught coz she got frens inside on that day, Sat she was standing outside most of the time...but she was not caught. I even helped her so many times, when she said she wana go home early (1.45am) I nvr tell anyone oso... I was just so so so UNLUCKY!

This few weeks i got drunk no one knows but all this small matter he make it as a rule and so strict! and start firing ppl. No matter how he wann us to b inside standing inside only! When stand inside customer see us thn will need to drink and dance not including being molested sometimes!!!!!! I know its ordinary but then when its for long term it would b wht?? i cant imagine! Y it had to b this stupid?

izit wrong to write my blog, izit wrong not to go in to stand? I dunno.. i only know this bastard wants ppl to see his power!I really wan die...